Were you paying attention?

3rd March 2006 at 00:00
1 Pencil sharpeners have been banned in a primary school because children were breaking them to get the blades out. What else should be banned?

a Sharp pencils

b Windows

c Blunt instruments

d Homicidal nine-year-olds

2 Teachers are near the top of the list for unpaid overtime. What do teachers say?

a It's the underpaid ordinary time that gets me

b I spend most of it sharpening pencils

c It's worth it to see those shining little faces

d Why won't they give me an even break?

3 Campaigners want Britain to go metric in time for the Olympics. What do teachers think?

a Not in my back metre

b Can we vote with our feet?

c I think ten-week terms are a good idea

d Do you mind? I've got all these pencils to sharpen

4 Prostitutes have been soliciting fathers outside school gates. What do the teachers say?

a It's the ones on the inside I worry about

b I bet they don't do unpaid overtime

c I knew that girl wouldn't go far

d Isn't that the careers officer?

5 The French are calling for lessons in EU values and history. What do they want covered?

a De Gaulle, Pompidou, Giscard d'Estaing

b Mitterand, Chirac

c Farm subsidies

d Le pied et bouche anglais

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