1 Ruth Kelly is now in charge of communities and local government. What will she do?
a Constantly drive up standards
b Constantly promise to constantly drive up something
c Constantly split infinitives
d Constantly drive everyone up the wall
2 A Real Fathers for Justice campaigner handcuffed himself to Beverley Hughes. What did she say?
a I want to discuss the key issues
b Have you got a hacksaw at home?
c Have you got a Catwoman costume at home?
d Will you come quietly?
3 The Government wants to introduce a national curriculum for babies. What will they need to do?
a Month 1: be kissed by a Labour MP
b Month 2: throw up over a Tory MP
c Month 3: laugh at a Lib Dem MP
d Month 4: be driven up the wall by Ruth Kelly
4 US researchers have found that a climate of fear boosts productivity.
What do teachers say?
a You mean there's another kind?
b No more Mister Nice Guy
c I've got a hacksaw at home, and I'm not afraid to use it
d This will hurt you more than it hurts me
5 Former schools minister Jacqui Smith has been made chief whip. What does this mean?
a Rebel MPs will have to stay in the chamber during break
b Rebel MPs will have to kiss extra babies
c Rebel MPs will be handcuffed to Beverley Hughes
d Rebel MPs won't be handcuffed to Beverley Hughes
Answers under the crossword
QUIZ ANSWERS: 1b, 2a, 3a, 4d, 5c