1 The DfES is one of the worst government wasters of water. What else does it waste?
a Money b Time c Space d All of the above
2 The National College for School Leadership says not all schools need a head. Whatever next?
a Turkeys will vote for Christmas b Charlton Heston will shoot himself in the foot c The DfES will shoot itself in the foot, probably with a water pistol d The NCSL will shoot itself in the head, and miss
3 Research shows that stone-age Britons had a one in twenty chance of being bashed on the head. What do teachers think?
a Ah, those were the days b They didn't all need heads anyway c I blame the parents d Back then they had to make their own fun
4 An academic claims that books raise standards more than computers. What do teachers say?
a What do you mean, where's the mouse?
b In the old days I could have bashed you on the head with it c Open your books at page 5. It comes right after page 4 d No, you can't cut and paste it into your coursework
5 A report shows that academy schools are failing to improve results. What do teachers say?
a I blame the parents b They're a waste of time and money. And possibly water c It's nothing a good book wouldn't solve d It's nothing a good bash round the head wouldn't solve