The Cannes film festival has kicked off in France this week, and in this unpredictable British weather, it’s all too easy to dream of a day spent schmoozing with the celebs, sipping cocktails on a yacht, and eating lunch with a child-free view.
But never fear! There are star spotting opportunities in your own classroom, should you look hard enough...
Hermoine Granger
She’s top of the class, head of the school council and always first to arrive. If she hasn’t got her hand up, she’s got her head in a book. Not only is her homework always on time, always pristinely presented and, of course, always right, she actually asks for homework at the end of the day. All in all, a perfect pupil. Until she corrects your maths problems, slight typos and criticises your handwriting.
Elliot
For Elliot, the word is a mysterious place. He spends most of his time in school gazing out of the window, seemingly in a world all of his own. It’s only in science when his interest peaks - with a keen interest in space, it’s obvious he’d make a brilliant astronaut. He’s also your first stop for all technological help.
Wednesday Addams
School is not Wednesday’s happy place. She shows little enthusiasm for anything, refuses to play with the other children, and has an uncanny ability to make you feel as if she’s staring directly in to your soul. The only lesson in which she ever shows any interest, quite unusually, is dance.
Charlie Bucket
Charlie is always happy, enthusiastic and sweet. He knows your favourite chocolate bar flavour and seems to have an endless supply of unhealthy goods - if only you had a class of 30 Charlie Buckets. But what isn’t ideal? Having his parents, maternal grandparents and paternal grandparents all rock up to every parents evening. And every class assembly. And every school trip.
Kevin McCallister
Kevin would forget his own head if it wasn’t screwed on. He’s enthusiastic during forest school, but is prone to wondering off by himself. He forgets his homework, book page, and is forever getting lost around the school building. And his parents aren’t much better - it’s not unusual for them to arrive for drop-off in the morning, only to discover they’ve left him at home.
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