Fairy Tales Assembly for Key Stage I (Numerous alternative fairy tale plays available for Key Stage II) This assembly or class play is based upon the following fairy tales: · Sleeping Beauty · Cinderella · Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs · The Three Little Pigs · Goldilocks and the Three Bears Cast of 30 (easily adaptable up or down) Duration Around 10 minutes reading time (without inclusion of music suggestions) Quite an eye-opener this one - for our narrator, at least! It would seem you really can’t judge a book by its cover - well, certainly not when you're dealing with these fairy tale characters! Sample Text: Music 6 Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf (Wolf suddenly jumps out from hiding, bringing cheerful singing to an abrupt halt) Wolf: (Grinning) Ha! Not so full of yourselves now, huh? Little Pig 1: (Hiding behind Little Pig 3) You don’t frighten me! Little Pig 2: (Hiding behind Little Pig 3) You can’t bully us! Wolf: (Laughing) Oh really? (Wolf lets out a huge growl and all three little pigs ‘run for their lives’) Wolf: (Laughing) Whose afraid now? Narrator: Now, that really wasn’t very nice of you! Wolf: (Repeating, incredulously) Nice of me? Whoever heard of a nice Big Bad Wolf? Narrator: But you’re not really big and bad, are you? Wolf: Of course not! But (pointing to the audience) I have to keep this lot happy, don’t I? Narrator: You mean, being big and bad is what is expected of you? Wolf: Of course! It’s all an act! Narrator: (Clapping) Well, you’re very convincing! And (looking at audience) I for one am mighty relieved he’s not as bad as you all think he is! (Wolf shakes hands with narrator, growls savagely at audience, and exits) Narrator: Ah! I do so love happy endings! Me still being alive, that is!

Robin Hood Assembly or Class Play Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down. Duration - around 15 minutes reading time. This does not include *music suggestions/dance routines which could potentially double the length of the performance. So, are those Merry Men about to have their smiles turned upside down? Never! Not even in the face of those brutish Guards? Double never! Not when you've got some neat tricks/moves up the sleeves of your tunic! See how good triumphs over evil without any blood being shed - it is a family show! *Sample Playlist • Bad – Michael Jackson • I Need a Hero – Bonnie Tyler • Everybody was Kung Fu Fighting – Carl Douglas • Happy – Pharrell Williams Sample Text Narrator: Hey! You might think you’re a hero! Peasant 1: But you haven’t done anything yet! Narrator: Right! All that dancing and prancing! Peasant 2: You need to demonstrate to us that you’re a hero! Narrator: No more theatrics! Peasant 3: Prove yourself! Narrator: Stop all this lovey dovey stuff – that can wait til later! Peasant 4: It’s our futures you need to change! Peasant 5: Show us you’re the man you say you are! Peasant 6: Take on those baddies! Peasant 7: Be our hero! Robin Hood: Hey! Steady on! I may be pretty good with this bow and arrow Maid Marion: (Sighing) The best, or so I’ve heard! Robin Hood: But taking on the whole of Prince John’s crowd? Whoa! That’s a tall order! (Enter Little John, squaring up to his great height) Little John: Well, I, Little John, am more than up to the challenge! (Enter rest of Merry Men) Friar Tuck: And you can count me, Friar Tuck, in! Alan-a-Dale: And me, Alan-a-Dale! Will Scarlet: And me, Will Scarlet! Much the Miller’s Son: And me, Much the Miller’s Son! Narrator: (Clutching head) Oh wow! That’s some fighting force you have there, Robin! An overweight man of the church, a minstrel, an ex-soldier and a miller’s son! Peasant 1: (Sarcastically) Wonderful! Peasant 2: More than enough to take on Prince John’s men! Peasant 3: They won’t know what’s hit them! Peasant 4: The friar’s belly Peasant 5: The minstrel’s lute Peasant 6: The ex-soldier’s rusting sword Peasant 7: Or the miller’s son’s bag of flour! Peasant 1: Some army! Come on, folks. Let’s leave this lot to their fantasies! (Exit Peasants, muttering sadly) (Enter Prince John, Sheriff of Nottingham and Sir Guy of Gisborne plus Guards) Sir Guy of Gisborne: (To Robin Hood) Aha! The villain himself! Seize him, guards! (Guards seize Robin Hood) Maid Marion: Why you cowards! Seven against one! I’d hardly say that was fair! Sheriff of Nottingham: (Laughing) But hadn’t you heard, sweet lady? Nothing is fair around here!

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz Play This re-telling of the original story stays true to the plot - with just a small twist at the end. Oh, and anyone wishing to play the original 'delightfully wholesome' Dorothy may be in for a bit of a shock! There is also a Christmas version of this class play or assembly - with, as you would expect, a few Xmas additions! This is available as a separate purchase. Cast of 30 (with some doubling up) Duration: Around 30 minutes not including the music suggestions. Also available: · The Wizard of Oz Guided Reading Scripts (10 of these, with 6 speakers each; around 3 minutes each – total reading time around 30 minutes Sample Text: Wicked Witch: Now. Where have that little gang of misfits got to? I don’t suppose anyone would miss them! Narrator: Whatever do you mean, ma’am? ‘Miss them’? Wicked Witch: Oh, haven’t you heard? I’m about to wipe them off the face of Oz! Good riddance I say! Narrator: (Gasping) You what? But you can’t! Wicked Witch: Oh really? Just watch me! (Enter Dorothy, Toto, Scarecrow, Tin Woodman and Cowardly Lion) Wicked Witch: Ah here they all are! Right on cue! Like lambs to the slaughter! (Sound of wolves howling) Wicked Witch: Bring on the wolves! (Enter wolves – who are then all ‘knocked out’ by Tin Woodman) (Whole cast cheers, as Tin Woodman waves his axe triumphantly) (Exit wolves, rubbing their heads) Wicked Witch: (To Tin Woodman) Hey! That’s no way to treat my pets! I’ll report you to the RSPCA! (Sound of Crows ‘cawing’) Wicked Witch: Bring on the crows! (Enter crows. Scarecrow pulls a silly face and they all retreat in terror) (Whole cast cheers, as Scarecrow struts up and down triumphantly) Wicked Witch: Hey! What happened to my crows? Narrator: (Pointing to Scarecrow) Well, he is a scarecrow, remember? (Wicked Witch stamps her foot in disgust) (Sound of bees buzzing) Wicked Witch: Bring on the black bees! (Enter bees. Each ‘stings’ Tin Woodman then ‘drops down dead’) (Whole cast cheers as Tin Woodman struts around victoriously) Wicked Witch: (Shrieking) Now what? What has happened to my black bees? Narrator: Er, I think you’ll find they just all died. Isn’t that what bees do, once they have stung? Wicked Witch: (Shaking fist) Drat! And double drat! Why didn’t I think of that? (Sound of marching feet) Wicked Witch: Bring on my Winkie Soldiers! (Enter Winkie Soldiers, marching purposefully towards ‘the group’) (Lion lets out a huge roar and the soldiers all panic and run away in terror) (Whole cast cheers as Cowardly Lion struts around triumphantly) (Wicked Witch screams her dismay) Wicked Witch: Right! That’s it! You’ve asked for it this time!

World Cup 2018 Quiz 100 questions (and answers!) on this year's World Cup and those that have gone before. Enjoy! Also available: World Cup Assembly, World Cup Leavers Assembly, World Cup Guided Readers plus resources on participating countries. Sample Text: I Quirky Facts 1. Who used to practice with a slipper on his right foot and why? 2. Where was the original world cup trophy kept during the Second World War? II 2018 World Cup 1. How often is the World Cup held? 2. Where is the 2018 World Cup being held? III History 1. When was the first World Cup held? 2. Where was it held? IV Records 1. What country has made the most appearances – the only country to have appeared in every World Cup? 2. How many appearances has this country made? V Quotations 1. Who said “Some people believe football is a matter of life and death. I’m very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that.” – said to be the greatest football saying in 2006?

Midsummer Nights Dream Alternative Version III This alternative ‘nightmare’ version of Midsummer Night's Dream runs at approximately 50 minutes, has a cast of 25, and a 'wicked' choice of music! This is the third in a series of scripts written by playwright Sue Russell - the first was for a small summer camp group (of 10), the second for an expanded cast (of 17), and this third for a cast of 25. Suitable for children and adults alike - let's hope your director has an easier time of it than mine (alias long suffering teacher!) Theseus: Are you referring to our night's entertainment, my dear? Hippolyta: If you can call it that! From what I've heard .. Theseus: (Interrupting) Ah, never judge a book by its cover! Teacher: (Raising his copy of Midsummer Night's Dream, above the covers) Indeed. You can say that again! Still, nothing's going to spoil anything tonight. Just as long as I stay awake to the end! (Bottom, bouncing onto the stage) Bottom: And we'll sure make sure that there's no falling asleep during our amazing performance! (Joined by Quince, Flute, Snout, Starveling and Snug) Bottom: Or should I say, my amazing performance! Quince: Now, now, Bottom! Remember what I said to you about team spirit! Bottom: (Tutting) Makes it sound more like a game of soccer! I prefer to think of myself as following in the footsteps of Brad Pitt, rather than David Beckham! Lysander: (Laughing) I'm sure either gentleman would be equally honored - to know who was following him! Demetrius: Of course! (Pointing at Bottom) What a fine figure of a man! Hermia: (Crossing her brow with her hand) I grow weak, just looking at him! Helena: (Pretending to faint) Such a man! Such a vision of .... Theseus: (Impatiently) Yes, yes. Could we leave the amateur dramatics to these 6 players please? Hippolyta: (Groaning) Something tells me, this is going to be one long night!

Love Is .... Assembly This class play on Love looks at what love means to each of us. Although it was written for Key Stage I (5 – 7 year olds) it can easily be adapted for use at Key Stage II (7 – 11 year olds) - the playlist of 10 suggested songs will be enjoyed by all ages. For scripts specific to Valentine’s Day, check out Sue Russell’s alternative Romeo and Juliet scripts. Cast of 25 - easily adapted up or down. Duration - around 15 - 20 mins (potential of doubling this with all music choices) Sample Text: (Enter Child 10, carrying a puppy) Music 7 Puppy Love – Donny Osmond Narrator: Ahh! (Gestures for everyone else to go ‘Ahhh!’) Who can resist a puppy? (Exit Child 10 plus puppy) (Enter Child 11, skipping) Narrator: Wow! Great skipping! You obviously love it! Child 11: And it’s good for me! (Exit Child 11, smiling happily) Narrator: Yes, any form of exercise is good for you! (Enter Child 12) Music 8 Can’t Stop the Feeling – Justin Timberlake (Whole cast singing and dancing) Narrator: And why do you love dancing so much? Child 12: How can you not love dancing? (Exit Child 12 smiling) Narrator: (Trying a few moves) Well, it is good exercise! (Enter Child 13, eating large bar of chocolate) Music 9 Sugar Sugar - The Archies Narrator: Hmm. I’m not sure this is quite so good for you! Child 13: Oh, but I just love chocolate! Who doesn’t? (Exit Child 13) Narrator: (Rubbing tummy) Mmmm. Beginning to feel a bit hungry! (Enter Child 14, reading ‘The Very Hungry Caterpillar’)

Halloween and Sleeping Beauty Assembly 'Wicked' is a Witch to be reckoned with ... so don't be fooled by her 'fairy' status! Cast Size: 15 - 30 Duration: Around 15 minutes not including music suggestions. I originally wrote this script for PSHE as the message behind it is 'always remember to say thank you'. I have adapted it to give it for Halloween. It can also be used at Christmas - a truly versatile script! Sample Text Wicked Fairy: So, what’s it to be? You doing a one-man show (Aside to audience) And let me tell you, he’s no Michael McKintyre! Or doing the sensible thing – and working with me? Narrator: OK! OK! You win. (Looking at watch) Now, could you do whatever you’re going to do rather quickly otherwise this audience is going to walk! Wicked Fairy: Very well! Here we go! (Wicked Fairy flicks her wand in the direction of the cast and they all wake up, rubbing their eyes and yawning) Narrator: Phew! Now we can get on with the show! So, whilst this lot wake themselves up a bit, I’ll tell you a little about today’s performance! It’s rather a nice story Wicked Fairy: (Yawning loudly) I’m bored already! Narrator: About a king and a queen Wicked Fairy: Boring! Narrator: And their longing for a child! Wicked Fairy: Poor misguided fools! Have they no idea how much trouble children can be? Narrator: (Angrily) Now look here, Miss …. Er um.. Wicked Fairy: You can call me ‘Wicked’! Narrator: Miss Wicked, then! I recognise what a fine job you did waking this lot up Wicked Fairy: And? Narrator: But I must insist you desist from hijacking this show! This is a nice story Wicked Fairy: So you said! And you know what? Nice really doesn’t do it for me! Narrator: (Impatiently) Well, that’s just too bad! For your information, wicked doesn’t do it for me! (Looking pleased with himself) Ha! Ha! Touche! Wicked Fairy: (To audience) See what I saved you from? And it’s not just his one liners that get worse! Narrator: (Looking at watch) Now, I really must ask you to leave – now! Wicked Fairy: Very well! But you will pay for your ill manners! Not so much as a thank you for my troubles? (To audience, stage whisper) Never fear, my revenge will be sweet! As Halloween approaches, a witch’s powers grow - getting greater and greater! (Pauses) Oh … hadn’t you guessed? This ‘Wicked Fairy’ thing is just a front – a disguise. I’m really a witch … and a very wicked one at that! See you around!

Nursery Rhymes Assembly for Key Stage One Cast Size: 25 easily adjusted up or down (Class teacher taking role of Narrator) Duration: Around 5 – 10 minutes This assembly is based on 10 nursery rhymes and, as explained in the production notes, can be seen as a template - adding or replacing rhymes as you see fit. There is a longer assembly available (around 15 - 20 minutes) which has a choice of 20 nursery rhymes - this one is called Nursery Rhymes Assembly Extended Version - and this could also be used by Key Stage II or used as a combined production, between both Key Stages - i.e. as a collaborative piece. Please note: the first half of the extended assembly uses the original 10 rhyme script i.e. just adds on. Sample Text: Narrator: What is that noise? (Enter cat playing fiddle, followed by cow holding moon; dog; and dish holding a spoon) (Whole cast recites rhyme; characters acting out the lines) Hey Diddle Diddle, The cat and the fiddle, The cow jumped over the moon; The little dog laughed To see such sport, And the dish ran away With the spoon. (Exit cat, cow, dog and dish) (Everyone uncovers their ears) Narrator: Oh thank goodness for that. I mean, don’t get me wrong – we all like a little music … but not quite like that! (Enter Little Miss Muffet) (Whole cast recites rhyme; characters acting out the lines) Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; (Enter Spider) There came a big spider, Who sat down beside her And frightened Miss Muffet away. (Exit Little Miss Muffet and Spider) Narrator: (Cowering behind children) Has it gone? Is it safe to come out yet? Whole cast: (Sighing) Yes. The spider’s gone, Miss! (Narrator returns to her former place) Narrator: Huh! Well, that’s fine then. (Pauses) Not that I was ever scared of that wee spider! Nah – just acting along with Miss Muffet there! (Whole cast look at each other, shaking heads) Narrator: (Coughing) Any how! Moving on. (Enter Old Mother Hubbard and her dog) Narrator: Ah! A dear old lady and her wee doggie. (Whole cast recites rhyme; characters acting out the lines) Old Mother Hubbard She went to the cupboard To fetch her poor dog a bone, But when she got there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. (Collective sympathetic sigh from the Cast) Narrator: Oh dear! Oh we can’t have that! (Narrator rummages around in her handbag and comes up with a bone) (Narrator holds up bone to dog which bounds over to Narrator in delight, barking happily, jumping up and down, and trying to lick her face)

Nursery Rhymes Origins Assembly This assembly on the origins of nursery rhymes covers ten nursery rhymes. All of these (bar one - Humpty Dumpty) are different from two other scripts on Nursery Rhymes - one (10 nursery rhymes) entitled: Nursery Rhymes Assembly for Key Stage I; and the other (20 nursery rhymes) entitled Nursery Rhymes Assembly Extended Version (which can be used by either Key Stage I or Key Stage II or both!) Cast Size - 30 - easily adjusted up or down Duration - around 20 minutes. Sample Text: Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king’s horses and all the king’s men Couldn’t put Humpty together again. Narrator: So. I’m hoping nothing worse than an omelette? Humpty Dumpty: (Indignantly) Not even as exciting as that! (Pauses) A cannon! Narrator: Pardon? The most well-known nursery rhyme Humpty Dumpty: I know! The best loved, the most popular, the Narrator: (Irritably) Yes, yes. (Aside to audience) I can see where the large head – make that ego - comes from! But do tell us about this cannon! Humpty Dumpty: Not a lot to tell, really. Apparently used in the English Civil War, placed on a wall, and, well, I don’t need to tell you the rest! (Exit Humpty Dumpty and soldiers) Narrator: Well, that was a bit of an anti-climax! I do hope we’ve got something better coming up before the end of this assembly. (Sound of noisy children) Narrator: (Looking at watch) Oh please don’t tell me its playtime already! (Enter Old Woman waving a stick as children run around her boisterously) (Whole cast recites nursery rhyme; Old woman and children act out lines) There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, she didn't know what to do; She gave them some broth without any bread; Then whipped them all soundly and put them to bed. Narrator: (Sarcastically) Delightful! (Aside to audience) I’ve no doubt we’ll be hearing from social services! Old Woman: No! No! Just giving them a little discipline! (Old Woman waves stick at Narrator who backs away quickly) Narrator: So, who was the real Old Woman? Old Woman: (Placing crown on her head) Ah that’s better! Queen Caroline II. I gave my husband eight children! (Looks around) It would seem some of them got away! Grrr! (Old Woman flails around with her stick) Where are the little blighters? Narrator: Long since gone, if they’ve got any sense!

Ancient Greek Myths Tale of Two Spinners Assembly or Class Play This class play can be used as an assembly (for performance) or as a class play, to be read within the classroom. It is part of a set of scripts written on the Ancient Greek Myths which includes Guided Reading scripts plus quizzes. The poem - The Spider and the Fly by Mary Howitt - is included in the text. Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration - around 10 - 15 minutes Sample Text: Narrator: Now, that’s better. (Ushering Incey Wincey Spider and Little Miss Muffet back to their seats) (To audience) You see how ridiculous this fear of spiders is? What do they call it? Arachn (Enter Arachne, scuttling on in spider costume) Arachne: Someone mention my name? Narrator: Ah! You’d be Arachne! As in Arachnophobia? Arachne: Well, I have no fear of spiders. I just am one! All thanks to (Enter Athene) Athene: Me! Arachne: Wretched goddess! (Athene scowls and raises her hand) Athene: (Menacingly) I’d be very careful what you say, if I were you Arachne! That tongue of yours has already got you into a whole heap of trouble! Arachne: (Gesturing at the spider outfit) Oh you mean this? Just because I said I was a better spinner than you! Athene: Foolish girl! What arrogance! You had to be punished! Arachne: That wasn’t quite the only reason I got punished, was it? Narrator: I’d say that was ample reason! Definitely too big for her boots, this one! Arachne: (Wailing) But I was brilliant at my craft. Athene: And didn’t you know it! You had to be taken down a peg or two.

Awe and Wonder Assembly Key Stage I (5 – 7 yrs) Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down. Duration - around 10 minutes reading time (not including music suggestions and songs). Longer performance easy - with simple addition of more information. Special guests to this class play: two superheroes - invited along to witness 'awesome' and 'wonderful' aka Nature and its superpowers - Who or what can beat a spider's artistry, a rainbow's beauty, the miracle of a butterfly and ... a great Milky Way! Awe and Wonder Assembly/Class Play available for Key Stage II (7 – 11yrs) – on Seven Natural Wonders of the World (Grand Canyon, Great Coral Reef etc). As a special offer, FREE with purchase of this script - a set of lovely photos taken at last year's Sensational Butterflies Exhibition at the Natural History Museum. Drop me a line at sue@plays-r-ussell.com Sample Text: (Enter 4 children in pyjamas) Narrator: Looks like you lot are ready for bed! Child 12: (Pointing up) Star gazing! Child 13: That’s what we’re doing! Child 14: (Sighing) They’re so beautiful! Child 15: (To Narrator) Care to join us? Narrator: Don’t mind if I do! What can you see? (As Narrator is gazing upwards, children share out chocolates among themselves; Narrator suddenly realises he has been ‘duped’) Narrator: Hey! Give me those chocolates! Child 12: But we’re about to tell you about them! Child 13: This one is the name of a group of stars – a galaxy! Child 14: This one is the galaxy we live in – the Milky Way! Narrator: (To Child 15) And this one? Child 15: Well, this one isn’t really a star. It’s a planet – Mars! Narrator: (Taking Mars bar) Well, I’d better have that one, then! (To audience, aside) My favourite!

Environment Assembly - what can we do to help? Cast of 30 - easily adapted up or down. Narrator plus 29 protestors! And who would have thought our narrator would find himself ... a protestor? Duration - around 15 minutes reading time (not including music suggestions). The length of the script can of course be easily extended by adding on more information about man's negative impact on the environment and what we can do to reduce our carbon footprints. Sample text: Protestor 28: We can all do something Protestor 29: Even if it’s just in our own back yard. Narrator: (Applauding) Ah! Now you’re making sense! You see, sometimes I think we look at the big picture Protestor 1: (Interrupting) And feel overwhelmed? Narrator: Exactly! I mean, we all know about global warming, the greenhouse effect, the destruction of rainforests. And I for one think, well, what can I do about it? Protestor 1: And the good news is Whole cast: (Shouting together) Plenty! Narrator: Oh really? Well, you know something? I’m feeling better already! Protestor 2: So, here’s what we can do to help and sustain our world. Narrator: Hold on! Could you just explain what you mean by that last bit? Protestor 2: What? You mean the bit about sustaining our world? Narrator: Yes. If you would, please. Protestor 3: OK. So what we mean by sustaining life on this planet is looking after it in a way or ways which will last. We’re not looking for quick fix solutions which won’t last. Narrator: Excellent. And by ‘life’ Protestor 4: We don’t just mean that of us human beings Protestor 5: But the life of plants Protestor 6: Wildlife Protestor 7: Ecosystems Protestor 8: And habitats Narrator: You mean like the rainforests, the poles, the deserts, the oceans Protestor 9: Well, yes. But there are places far nearer to home that we can make a difference to now. Narrator: (Wiping his brow) Phew! I am so relieved you said that. I was beginning to feel overwhelmed again! Protestor 10: Let’s keep this simple! Narrator: Oh please! That would be a great comfort to me! Protestor 11: So, what can we do in our own back yard? Protestor 12: Clear it up? (Everyone laughs) Protestor 11: You’re right! That’s a good place to start. We all have way too much rubbish! Narrator: So how can we stop that? Protestor 12: How about we start with recycling? Narrator: You mean cycling … in reverse? (Everyone groans) Protestor 12: How about you leave the jokes to us! Though, recycling is no laughing matter. We should all be doing it.

St. George's Day Poem (or Ode to St. George) This poem was written in celebration of St. George's Day. It's about championing the cause of a national holiday and celebrating England as a country. Sample text: Rule Britannia! St. George's Day is here. England never shall have Anything to fear! Land of Hope and Glory Mother of the Free We have no national holiday Now how can that be? St. George, get off your charger And come and sort this out. If you truly champion valour Then leave us in no doubt. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ (Following emboldened text spoken by St. George) OK, I wasn't born in England That is certainly true. I was actually born in the Middle East When Christianity was taboo. But wait a while, have you not heard Exactly how I lost my head? In defending my own Christian faith I ended up .... Dead! An inspiration To those Crusaders later. If you don't believe me, kids, Go check your data! I know how much England Means to you. Keep pride in your country Trust me ‐ I do! It's a while since I fought For any worthwhile cause. But give me a chance And I'll champion yours! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- England has history that goes on forever (Makes up, perhaps, for our crummy weather!) England produced the Beatles, the Stones and the Who And a capital city, London - equaled by few. England serves the very best tea England has health care that is free. England is the place to be England is the land of the free.

Ancient Greek Myths The Gorgon's Head Assembly or Class Play Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration: around 10 - 15 minutes not including music What was Poseidon thinking - taking on all these women? He might succeed at putting the youth Perseus in his place but a group of 'wronged women'? Never! This is one of a large collection of Ancient Greek scripts written by Sue Russell – guided reading scripts also available. Sample Text: Medusa: Just like I said! Gods! Men! The bane of our lives! Poseidon: (Clutching his forehead, muttering) I think I have a headache coming on. (Pauses)You know something? I suddenly feel just a little outnumbered! Would you ladies mind just giving me a short break? (Exit Athene, Medusa and Danae, shrugging their shoulders) Poseidon: Phew! Peace at last! Oh, don’t get me wrong. I have nothing against ‘the weaker sex’ (Athene comes storming back) Music 3 War – Edwin Starr – Brief excerpt Athene: What was that you just said? Weaker, eh? I’ll show you weaker! (Athene strides up and down, wielding her sword) Poseidon: (Holding hand up) OK. I apologize. Athene: Goddess of wisdom and war! (To Poseidon) You’d do well to remember that! Poseidon: (Aside) As if I could forget! (To Athene) Now, what was I saying about having a little peace? Athene: Huh! Give me war any day! (Exit Athene) Poseidon: (Clutching head) Women! I knew I should never have agreed to this! (Enter Perseus, giving Poseidon a ‘high five) Perseus: What’s up, bro? Poseidon: (Indignantly) Bro? I’ll give you bro! Perseus: OK so I guess it’s Uncle, really – seeing as Zeus was my dad, and your brother! Poseidon: Correct! So, no more bro, right? Perseus: Fair enough! So, what’s the plan, dude? Poseidon: (Exploding) Dude? That’s even worse than bro! What is it with you youngsters? Can’t you talk normally? Perseus: (Sighing) OK I’ll try! I’m just not used to hanging out with oldies like you! Poseidon: (Exploding) Now look here, young Perseus! If you and me are going to get along, you need to show a little respect! (Enter Danae) Danae: Perseus! Where are those manners I taught you? Poseidon: I think he might have lost them during his travels! Danae: Well, let’s help him find them again! Poseidon is only trying to Poseidon: (Looking at his watch) Get this story told? Well, that’s proving a bit of a challenge! (To Danae) No offence, madam, but you women don’t half talk a lot! (Enter Polydectes, accompanied by ‘several’ women, all chatting and laughing) Polydectes: (Groaning) Tell me about it! You want to try keeping them quiet in court! Once they get going there’s no stopping them!

Ancient Greek Myths Pandora's Box Assembly or Class Play This class play can be used as an assembly (for performance) or as a class play, to be read within the classroom. Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration - around 15 - 20 minutes reading not including music suggestions. The Seven Deadly Sins plus all those Vices? No wonder our Narrator is worried! But as with all good stories, this one has a happy ending - well, maybe not for all those baddies! This is one of a collection of Ancient Greek Myth scripts – assemblies and guided reading scripts, sold as separate and combined products. This play could also be used as a PSHE resource – on resisting temptation, and the victory of good (hope) over evil (Seven Deadly Sins plus, in this case 19 Vices). Sample Text: Music 5 – You’re Beautiful – James Blunt (Epimetheus sings love song to Pandora) Narrator: (Indicating for music to stop) Yes, yes. We get it! Young love! Epimetheus: Oh come on! Look at this perfect woman? How could I possibly resist? Narrator: (To audience) Aha! Somebody else who couldn’t resist temptation! (To Pandora) No offence to you, madam. (To Epimetheus) But did you not look a little deeper? I mean, yes, she’s undoubtedly beautiful but (Optional burst of The Price You Pay – Bruce Springsteen) Pandora: (Angrily) Oh right! It’s the blond argument, right? The ‘well, if she looks that good, there can’t be much underneath’? No spirit, heh? Music 6 Missionary Man – Eurythmics (Pandora throws off her ‘pretty clothes’ displaying a much stronger image) Narrator: (Holding up hand for music to stop) Whoa! That’s not the Perfect Pandora I was expecting! Epimetheus: (Gasping) And that’s not a side of my wife I’ve ever seen before! Pandora: Of course not! You only ever wanted me to be that perfect ‘domestic goddess’ – sitting around, looking pretty, staring vacantly out to space! Epimetheus: Well, isn’t that what wives are supposed to do? Narrator: Not this one, I suspect! (Optional excerpt of Thorn in my Side – Eurythmics – Pandora strutting up and down) Narrator: (Holding hand up) OK. Yes, we’ve got it! So underneath all that sweetness was a whole heap of frustration! Pandora: More like mega boredom! I mean, what was I supposed to do all day? Epimetheus: Stay out of mischief?

General Election Assembly - Who should be our next prime minister? 6 weeks to go … and bored with the General Election already? Then this assembly is your perfect tonic! As for our narrator, who would envy their task of choosing a prime minister - from a class of 30?! The choice? Football stars, movie stars, rock stars ..... and a whole lotta girl/boy attitude between the Spice 'lot' and a certain Direction! Somebody needs to tell them about equality - and who better than .... S Club 7?! This is a very light hearted look at the coming election. The ‘possible candidates’ are a selection of celebs – chosen purely for entertainment sake. For a more serious ‘take’, the script could be adapted to include a far more serious list of people either now or in the past e.g. Gandhi, King, Mandela, Mother Theresa etc. Likewise, whilst dealing with the current topic of the election, this script could be used for citizenship because of its PSHE component – this latter could be extended by adding a section on ‘What would you change if you were prime minister?’ Duration: 10 – 15 minutes reading time; around 20 – 30 minutes including music suggestions. Cast of 30 - easily adapted up or down; and characters may be replaced by children’s own choices. Sample Text Child 1: I think David Beckham should be prime minister! Child 2: Nah! It’s got to be Lionel Messi! Child 3: No! Wayne Rooney has my vote! Child 4: Rubbish! It’s got to be Cristiano Ronaldo! Narrator: (Blowing whistle) Excuse me! Since when did any of these footballers know anything about politics? They might be pretty good at running up and down a pitch, but running a country? I don’t think so! (Exit Child 1, 2, 3 and 4) Narrator: Next! (Enter ‘athlete’ – Child 5) Child 5: I’m here representing the world of athletics! I’d vote for Jessica Ennis! Narrator: (To audience, sighing) What is it with kids and sport? (To Child 5) Yes, I can see why you might think Ms Ennis would set us all a fine example Child 5: A prime role model! An inspiration to us all! Narrator: Yes, yes. I totally agree! But there is a difference between running along those tracks Child 5: In record times! Narrator: And, …..let me finish…., running the country! (To audience) Am I having a moment of déjà vu or didn’t I just say that a very short while ago? (To Child 5) Anyway. Thank you … but no thank you! (Exit Child 5) Music 3 Theme music from Doctor Who

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland Take Two - or The Trial of Alice (An alternative version) Insolent, conceited, insensitive, stupid, cruel, dishonest .... surely not the Alice that Lewis Carroll gave us? Read on to find out how false fiction can be in this alternative take on one of our best loved classics. In this one Alice is facing those animals she met ‘down the rabbit hole’ on her first visit – in court! See how she fares under the pressure of the justice system – Wonderland-Style! PLEASE NOTE: This is not a re-telling of the original story. Cast of 30. Duration: Longer version around 20 - 25 minutes; Shorter version around 15 – 20 minutes. Sample Script: Alice: Now look! There’s been some terrible mistake! I’m here to be queen, not prisoner! (Whole court erupts in laughter) Queen: (Holding her sides) Oh dear! This really is turning out to be the funniest day of my life! King: Totally priceless, my dear! Alice: (Sobbing) No! No! This can’t be happening. White Rabbit will tell you it as it is! (White Rabbit just shrugs his shoulders) Alice: Oh no! This has got to be a bad dream I’ll wake up from in a minute! (Alice pinches herself and then cries even more) (Mouse, Duck and Dodo stand up) Mouse: Oh oh! She’s making one of those lakes again! Duck: That’s how she caught us out last time! Dodo: Playing the innocent! Mouse: And then scaring me to death with stories of that cat! Alice: You mean, Dinah? (Mouse starts screaming; other two get him to sit down) Duck: (To King) You see what I mean? Dodo: Ah! She’s not going to get away with it a second time! (King gestures for both to sit down) Alice: Get away with what? Queen: (To King) Does it matter? Off with her head! Alice: I was wondering when you were going to get round to saying that! King: Oh! The cheek! (To jurors) Please note. Offence Number one – Threatening Behaviour Alice: But I King: Offence Number Two – Interrupting Alice: But that’s not fair! King: Offence Number Three – Whingeing and complaining Alice: Hey, wait a minute King: Offence Number Four – Speaking out of turn (Alice is about to say something else but White Rabbit rushes over and puts his paw over her mouth) Queen: (To White Rabbit) Thank you! She really doesn’t know when to shut up, does she? King: No my dear! Not at all like you! Queen: Not at all! Alice: Huh! That’s a joke! Queen: (Screaming) Off with her head! Off with her head! (King ‘calms her down’ before addressing jurors again, both scribbling away trying to keep up) King: Make that Offence Number Five – Being Insolent and Rude and Juror 1: Please slow down a bit. Juror 2: We’re not used to as many offences as this!

Burns Night Assembly Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration: Around 15 - 20 minutes (depending on number of music suggestions included). The assembly could be further extended by the addition of some of the poems of Robbie Burns. Who would not want to come to this party? Well, if you're not keen on bagpipes, it could be a problem! But the guest list is pretty unbeatable - with the likes of St Andrew, William Wallace, Mary Queen of Scots, James VI, Robert the Bruce, Walter Scott plus fellow writers, Alexander Bell plus fellow scientists, John McAdam plus fellow engineers, some sportsmen, politicians (fraid so!), that oh so enthusiastic chef (no prizes for guessing what he's served up!), Nessie (of course!) and not forgetting - that guy with the bagpipes .... oh and Robbie Burns!! This script comes with some seriously bad jokes – would definitely get the thumbs down from that other Mr Burns of Simpsons fame! Sample Text (Enter bagpipes player, with loud bagpipe accompaniment) (Everyone groans and cover their ears) Narrator: Stop! Please! I think I’m going mad! Bagpipes player: Och! You need to chill out a little, man! (Takes out bottle of whisky from inside kilt) Here! Have some of this fine Scottish whisky! Nothing quite like it for lessening the old stress levels! Narrator: (Taking the bottle and having a sip) Well as long as it means your volume levels take a corresponding dip! Bagpipes player: Oh to be sure! If that’s what keeps you happy! (Enter Scottish chef carrying tray of haggis) Scottish chef: And here’s something else to warm your inners! (Narrator takes a bite followed by a coughing fit) Narrator: What on earth was that? Scottish chef: Oh! Just a bit of sausage I cooked up! Narrator: Er, something tells me you’re holding back a bit on the description there? Scottish chef: Oh, didn’t I mention? It’s the inner organs of a sheep … cooked in the stomach of a sheep! (Narrator has explosive coughing fit) Scottish chef: Oh, and if you want to know what those organs are, they’re the liver, heart and lungs. Plus a little seasoning! Delicious, eh? (Narrator continues to ‘gag’) Bagpipes player: (To chef) Er, far be it from me to interrupt but I think we’ve had enough description! Scottish chef: Oh very well! (Placing tray on a chair) I’ll leave it here for you all to enjoy. (Whole cast pull faces) (Testily) This is meant to be a Burns celebration, you know! Other Scottish scripts available from Sue Russell. Please note: there is some duplication of content and characters in this script and the St. Andrews Assembly/Class Play.

Russian Assembly or Class Play Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration - 10 - 20 minutes. (20 mins with inclusion of music suggestions and performances) Script can be further extended to include more information on the country. As always our narrator has his work cut out – kicking off assembly with having to keep bolshy Bolsheviks apart from arrogant tsars. Nothing bolshy about those Bolshoi ballerinas, fortunately - but who invited that mob of unruly Chelsea supporters along?! Normal formula of fun and laughter mixed in with a generous spattering of facts .. demonstrating just how much a country of contrasts Russia is. This script will be adapted to include longer reference to 2018 World Cup, nearer the time. Sample Text: Narrator: That’s better! Now let’s see. (Looking through script) What are a load of Chelsea Football supporters doing here in my Russian assembly? Supporter 1: Oh! Hadn’t you heard, mate? Supporter 2: Heard? Heard what? Supporter 3: That Chelsea Football Club is owned Supporter 4: By a Russian! Supporter 1: One Roman Obramovich! Supporter 2: One of the richest men in the world! Supporter 3: In charge of the greatest team in the world! (Half the cast boo and wolf whistle; and Narrator ushers supporters off before there is trouble) (Exit Chelsea supporters) Narrator: (Sighing) Oh dear! Nothing like lowering the tone of my assembly. It was all so lovely and cultured before that noisy lot turned up! (Enter 2 artists, Marc Chagall and Wassily Kandinsky, setting up their easels and painting, silently) Narrator: Ah! That’s more like it! The silent world of art! And who better to represent it than these two amazing Russian artists Marc Chagall: (Holding up picture of The Fiddler) Marc Chagall! Music 4 Fiddler on the Roof theme tune (Chorus from the musical could be performed either by the artist, Chagall, or someone else in the cast) Narrator: (Applauding) Wonderful! (To second artist, Wassily Kandinsky) And you, sir? Wassily Kandinsky: (Holding up Squares with Concentric Circles) Wassily Kandinsky Narrator: And this artwork is called? Wassily Kandinsky: Squares with Concentric Circles! Why do you look so surprised? Narrator: (Uneasily) Oh just expecting something …er. Em Wassily Kandinsky: (Angrily, snatching up his easel) A little more abstract?

Fashion Assembly including The Emperor’s New Clothes The story of The Emperor’s New Clothes provides the bulk of the text - with a minimum cast of 10; cast numbers are made up to 30 by the addition of numerous fashion models, plus ‘sparring’ fashion designer and narrator! Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration - reading of text around 15 minutes but this does not include music or performances - both of which can be increased to effectively double the length of the play. Sample Text (1): Music 1 – You’re So Vain – Carly Simon (Whole cast files in, seating themselves in order, along two rows of fifteen, facing the audience, Narrator standing at the side throughout) Narrator: Good morning and welcome to our assembly on Whole cast: (Together) Fashion! Music 2 – Fashion – David Bowie (Line of fashion models walk up and down ‘the catwalk’ in front of the audience) Narrator: (Applauding as models return to their places) Very good! Bravo! (To audience) But seriously! Did you see the size of those heels? I mean, how on earth do they manage to walk on such things? Impractical or what? (Enter Fashion Designer) Fashion Designer: (Sniffing his disapproval) Oh! Hasn’t anyone told you? It’s about how you look on that catwalk. Narrator: (Angrily) Even if it cripples you? Fashion Designer: Oh darling! Aren’t we being just a tad overdramatic? Narrator: (Huffily) No, not really! I wouldn’t be able to move in those heels! (Fashion Designer pointedly looks Narrator up and down) Fashion Designer: No, I don’t suppose you would! (Aside to audience) No great loss to the fashion world, right? Sample Text (2) - from The Emperor’s New Clothes Narrator: Once upon a time there lived an emperor who was very fond of his clothes. (Enter Emperor and two courtiers) Emperor: (Twirling on the spot) So, what do you think of my outfit today? Courtier 1: (Gushing) Magnificent! Courtier 2: (Even more gushing) Fantastic! Emperor: (Preening himself) Oh really! Flattery will get you nowhere! Courtier 1: (Aside) Wanna bet? Courtier 2: We wouldn’t get far without it! Emperor: What was that? Commenting on the quality of this wonderful fabric, no doubt? Courtier 1: Oh, of course, majesty! Courtier 2: The finest in the land, to be sure! Emperor: I rather think so! (Aside) Best not say how much it cost! More than I pay these two courtiers in a year! (To Courtier 1) A mirror, please! It must be at least a minute since I looked at myself!